No, Sergio! Jeans Should Run Larger Than Size 12

Dear Fashion Police: I read an article recently about the newly popular designer jeans trend and the return of Sergio Valente jeans. In the article, it said the jeans for women will not go any larger than a size 12. Let’s all risk being hospitalized for anorexia so we can fit into those oh-so-cool Sergios! It’s time some of these designers stopped trashing women and making the size 14s and over feel like ugly fatsoes. I hope this trend doesn’t last!

--STICKING WITH LEVI’S

Dear Stick: Looks like the old ad slogan “Uh-oh, Sergio!” is taking on a new meaning.

We were also disappointed to read that this rerun of Sergio Valente jeans, those second-skin denims that defined the disco era, were not topping a size 12. And it wasn’t because we hoped to squeeze into one of the late models (not in this lifetime).

No, we were disappointed because of this quote, taken from an L.A. Times story, from Valente President Mary Wilberding: “Our attitude is that if you can’t wear it to look good, you shouldn’t wear it. We want Sergios to have that kind of snob appeal.”

But there’s more to this issue than that statement. We contacted Mimi Turner, also of New York-based Valente, and she told us this is not a size-ist issue.

“Originally when we relaunched the jeans, I cut up to a size 36 waist, but the demand for the larger waist sizes was almost nil,” she said. “That demand comes from the retailer, who responds to the requests of the customers. So next time when we did the cuttings, we knocked them out.” (Incidentally, they originally made men’s jeans too, but Turner said there had been little demand for those as well.)

We asked whether she thought this downsizing was odd, considering the statistics that say women are getting larger: “It might be that the appeal of the jeans is that they’re tight-fitting, and that might not appeal to someone who is larger, although there are always going to be exceptions. But right now, the demand is not there. If the demand does increase, without a doubt we’ll make them.”

Turner added that you are welcome to call the company at (212) 947-1888 and request a larger size, since there are still some left.

We hope that a pair of tight jeans won’t lead impressionable girls to do destructive things to their bodies, but don’t lose too much sleep over this newest retro fad. While fashion at times seems more exclusive than inclusive, many designers continue to make great clothes in larger sizes.

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Dear Fashion Police: I am a 51-year-old man with a 7-year-old nephew. Nate, as he’s called, has a different outlook than most. You may think of him as a born rebel, since Nate won’t set foot out of the house--even to play--unless he is dressed as one might expect him to look if he were about to take part in a wedding: long-sleeve white shirt, black bow tie, and black pants, shoes and socks. Last Christmas, he asked his parents for a white tuxedo!

I often think of young Nate and wonder what he’ll grow up to be. I also wonder if perhaps one or more of today’s fashion designers or models might have started out in life as Nate has?

--WONDERING UNCLE

Dear Unc: No doubt there have been designers and models past and present who, as children, were sartorial savants, amazing their parents with their preternatural ability to coordinate outfits.

Will Nate grow up to be the next Tom Ford or Karl Lagerfeld? No one can predict that. Maybe he’ll be a brilliant engineer who will always be perfectly dressed for any occasion (except if he ever gets that white tuxedo). But if he shows any talent toward designing, don’t discourage him. The world can always use more good designers.

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From the Fashion Police Blotter: If it’s spring, it must be the Masters tournament, which means the return of those noxious green jackets that adorn the winner. Now we know this is a long-standing and wonderful golf tradition and it’s an honor to wear it and blah, blah, blah, but let’s get real: No one looks good in that shade of green. If you’re giving a guy a big award, don’t you want him to look really handsome? Maybe put him in a black Armani instead of this frightening poly-cotton number? It’s a blessing that the winner can only wear it at the Augusta National Golf Club and golf-related events and has to return it at the end of the year. Can you imagine showing up at a dinner party in that thing?

No arrests will be made this year--we’re going to let the club off with a warning. Just keep in mind that sometimes it’s a good thing to mess with tradition.

* When reporting or preventing a fashion crime, write to Fashion Police, Life & Style, Los Angeles Times, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053, or fax to (213) 237-0732. Submissions cannot be returned. No telephone inquiries, please.